So, here’s a story: There are a few people who attended my wedding, ten years ago, who didn’t give us a gift. One of them was a very close friend, and I have never mentioned it. I don’t actually care. We don’t need anything. But once in a while I think about it, because before the wedding she mentioned something about the gift she was going to give us, but we never received one. So, to this day I have no idea if she never gave it to us or if it got lost somehow and she thinks we got it and that we are the rude ones for never thanking her. Or what. Because how do you bring something like that up? I’ll probably never know.
Some people don’t have the same hang ups as me, apparently.
I recently attended an ex-colleague’s wedding where, in response to a request for cash gifts, I sent what I thought was a pretty decent cheque (£100 if it matters, though I can’t help feeling it shouldn’t)
Last night I received an email which opened with a few comments about how glad they were to see everybody and how generous they’d all been, then said “we were surprised that your contribution didn’t seem to match the warmth of your good wishes on our big day. In view of your own position, if you wanted to send any adjustment it would be thankfully received”
For someone who’s not easily shocked I confess I’m utterly gobsmacked by this. So as not to drip feed I’ll mention that “your own position” probably refers to a recent inheritance I’ve had, which maybe they expected something from (and this is an ex-colleague, remember, not a close friend or relative)
Please, anyone, what do I do now? I’ve never come across anything like this before and still can’t quite believe they’ve done it – but since they have, should I reply, ring them, ignore it or what??
The forum is filled with suggestions ranging from calling the couple out publicly to trying to get the money back. I don’t know what I would do. But I think I would probably just ignore it and write them off.
But I did find the query interesting because aren’t people funny? Who would do something like this? Or am I the one who’s weird for not ever asking my friend if she ever gave me a wedding gift?
Have you ever complained to someone about the stinginess of a gift? Or received a similar complaint?
Don’t ever do this. Please.
There, I saved you from behaving like a total jerk. You’re welcome.